I’d often wonder if African peoples from before they were colonized had more comprehensive concepts of what constitutes a person, and how they understood romantic and sexual encounters between people. I wonder if by revisiting some of these concepts and reintroducing them, we can build a bridge to better care for, and respect queer Africans. Indegious african perspectives on sexuality are desirable, but not necessary to guarantee the dignity of members of our community.
The rich aunt touched by Marzel: Elegant and beautiful. Foreshadowing a season of drought in my life – she makes it rain ! Bless her heart !
In Yoruba tradition, it was acceptable for a man to bring in a second, third, even fourth wife, as long as they all respected the women that came before them. As my age group grew older and more exposed to the larger world, we began to discuss these traditions, sorting out the ones that worked for us and the ones that did not.
As a child, I would sit on our living room couch for hours listening to my father tell stories from back home. Despite being miles away from Oromia, he carried their oral storytelling traditions with him. It was through these stories I was first introduced to the rich and complex history and culture of my people. For centuries storytelling served …
When any couple ties the knot, they bring together long-standing traditions with at times convoluted histories, not unlike that of jumping the broom. Ultimately, wedding customs exist to accent the joining of families and the declaration of mutual love and fidelity.
There is a good story, the Law of the Grazing Field by Cyprian Ekwensi , and in this story a woman and her groom run away to get married because they might not be permitted to marry in their homes. This also happens traditionally in Somalia. If you are closer than 80km away from the girl’s parents, without their permission, you can not marry.
Bride price, sometimes called bridewealth, often understood as “purchase money” was regarded as incompatible with British legal jurisprudence and colonial Christian traditions. It became an obstacle to the legal recognition of indigenous marriage practices. Contemporary feminists consider the practice to be inherently anti-feminist and a relic of the pas that upholds traditional patriarchal norms. In some ways, they are correct, …
I suggest instead of roora being viewed or used as a purchase, it is considered to be a respectful exchange between both families. A sign of goodwill. Similar to the transfer of a wedding ring, it comes with the added benefit of milk production and calves. Traditional and contemporary needs are met, and everyone’s appetite, satisfied.
During their time, when children are born, the male and the female child are betrothed to one another. The male’s family will come to the home of the female’s family and ask for her hand in marriage. She will marry the man that her family has agreed from birth that she should marry.
There is an unspoken rule that the child of a couple that has not celebrated a traditional wedding in full cannot celebrate one of their own. So Mama and Papa Chisom are doing their winecarrying ceremony, at last; they are moving on from the Imego fulfilled 25 years ago to the Igba nkwu
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